The myth of the perfect baby

Yep, you guessed it, I'm gonna talk about my ass again.  I wish it was back in the days when talking about my ass meant that it was a thousand men at once drooling over my bottom and telling me how great I looked.  Looked, past tense.  I don't think any of me looks that great any more.  For those of you not in the know, for a good long while I was an adult entertainer.  Of the webcam variety.  Like a stripper, but on a webcam and with "extras".  I'm sure a lot of you wouldn't be proud of that.  I'm sure a lot of you will actually think less of me now for even knowing it, but you know what?  I enjoyed the job.  It  was from home, in the comfort of my own bedroom, I made my own hours and I made some damn good money doing it.  My husband thought it was awesome because I was the kind of woman men paid to look at from afar.  I was the kind of woman even other women paid to view.  I was ranked pretty high on the paid sites ...

When I was pregnant with Phiz, my case manager at Care1st called the area I live Never Never land, because if you need good medical care you're never never going to get it.  Oh my good golly is that ever the fucking case when it comes to good old Antelope Valley Hospital Medical Center's Emergency Department. Over the last week I dealt with a nasty clogged duct in my left boob.  THE boob, the one with the pacemaker up top, so it's painful when that boob even gets full, let alone a clogged duct, but they happen. Of course when it happens it's that boob and the duct right under the pacemaker. Since the pacemaker is generally sore ANYWAY, and something I never mention because frankly, if I mentioned every time something hurt on me I'd never say anything else.  So the clogged duct had a weird milk blister thing that I was able to get easily with a sterilized tweezers and the milk started flowing just fine and all was well that day. The next day, the duct was clogged a...