The myth of the perfect baby

I don't even know where to begin today.  My life is so much different than it had ever been in any of my previous posts.  In part because the whole world is in crisis mode right now, and in part because my whole world changed but it was given back too.  Let me explain... Way back in July of 2017 I was cheating on my husband and he got drunk and kicked me out *rightly so I absolutely think he should have*.  I moved in with that man and proceeded to have the strangest 2 years of my life until he up and left with almost no warning on May 31 2019 and I had no choice but to be homeless or move back in with my still legal husband and kids and my adult daughter and her kids.  So guess where I live now?  With my legal husband and my kids and my adult daughter, her fiance and her kids. I say my legal husband because we didn't get back together when I moved back in, we just are best friends now.  And I can honestly say I will be extremely jealous when he finds...

Yeah, it's me again.  I do this sometimes, ya know, that thing where I actually give a shit about life and try to make a go of things?  So fuck what you heard it's what you hearin.  Yup, I'm quoting DMX.  What else to you expect the girl with the Deadpool tattoo to do? Damn I hate this shit though...I hate the not knowing.  But I do know this:  It always works out the way it's supposed to.  Always.  Today is a significant date for me, for Ronnie, for our family.  My whole world changed 12 years ago, and for the worse, for the better, forever.  I lost a baby 12 years ago today.  Not a miscarriage per se, but a premature stillbirth due to amniotic infection.  It's a long story, I think I've told the story before if you look back through the archives and I choose not to taint my happiness today with the hurt and heartache retelling it causes.  So I won't.  Needless to say,  he was lost, and it changes a person. ...

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